Counseling Children to Help Them Handle A Divorce!

Learning that their parents are getting a divorce can be scary and upsetting for younger children who may not understand what is happening.

When working with clients who are parents, divorce attorneys find that counseling kids as the process is happening can be helpful.

Though spouses are working with their divorce lawyers to end their marriage and will go their own way afterward, it will benefit their children if they can work together to be supportive and help their kids understand what is happening and why by working together to provide valuable parental counseling. 

Parents Need to Explain What Is Happening With The Divorce

Divorce law firms advise that in doing so, parents should be prepared to answer many questions and realize that their kids may be experiencing a number of negative emotions such as worry, fear, guilt, and loneliness. 

Kids may worry that they will be abandoned by one or both parents or that somehow the divorce is their fault.

Divorce attorneys advise their clients that parents should start out by explaining that this is not at all the case, but then give their kids the opportunity to voice their worries and fears so they can be addressed in an effort to ease those fears and help kids understand what to expect as time goes on. 

Parents Must Avoid Blaming The Other Partner For The Divorce

Using age-appropriate messaging as pointed out by divorce lawyers, parents should be open with their kids but also avoid finger-pointing or saying things that pit one parent against the other.

Divorce law firms know that the goal of parental counseling must always be to boost the children up so they regain their confidence and are more easily able to adapt to the changes that will come in the future.

Kids should not be used as a go-between for parents, keeping information with divorce attorneys about adult and financial concerns should remain private; however, keeping kids involved in the divorce is recommended by divorce lawyers with as much openness as possible.

Counseling Can Be Helpful For Children Of A Divorce

Should children react poorly to news of the divorce or of changes that will be coming in the future, parents are encouraged by their divorce law firms to be patient with them and remain reassuring.

If bad behavior at home or school occurs, make use of resources like school counselors or professional counselors, both of whom can be instrumental in helping some kids accept the divorce and the changes that will be coming.

Divorce lawyers advise their clients that online counseling can be especially helpful for teens, who might also be going through the turmoil of simply growing up. 

Helping Children Understand Is Vital

Divorce attorneys advise that regardless of how it is done, parents owe it to their children to counsel them about the divorce, respect their feelings and worries, and if necessary get them professional counseling that can help.

Counseling is critical for helping kids of all ages process a divorce and what their roles will be in a new family structure.

With caring conversation and concern, divorce law firms advise their clients that children of all ages can eventually learn to be okay with what is happening and maintain a good relationship with both parents, even after a divorce.

Do I Still Need A Divorce Lawyer When Choosing Mediation?

In a best-case scenario, clients of divorce law firms seeking a divorce can work together to resolve their differences and make critical decisions without the prolonged and often traumatic process of going to divorce court.

Mediation done with an experienced divorce mediator is an option many willing spouses choose for getting through those decisions, whether related to property dispersal, child custody, or anything else. 

Is A Divorce Lawyer Needed When Using Mediation?

When choosing mediation, many question whether they still need to hire divorce lawyers, too.

Although there is no rule that states someone must do that, there are many reasons why working with divorce attorneys even when choosing mediation is the best idea.

The best way to understand why is to learn the difference between what each professional does to help clients through their productive and amicable divorces.

Divorce Mediators and Divorce Lawyers

Primarily, the difference between divorce lawyers and mediators is that lawyers are professionals who offer legal advice that is in their client's best interest and follows the law, while mediators focus on resolving questions and disputes between the spouses as they try to separate themselves and make essential divorce decisions.

In this case, the happy medium is when mediators help clients make their decisions which divorce attorneys find to be equally acceptable in how they affect their clients.

Neither professional can force a client to agree to any one decision, but it is the attorney’s job to point out as decisions are being discussed and made what is in their client’s best interest and what isn’t.

This is why mediation usually occurs with the two spouses separated, but each is able to discuss with their divorce lawyers as negotiations are happening. 

How Are Divorce Mediators and Divorce Attorneys Different?

A mediator’s job is to guide spouses through the decision-making process and act as a go-between to help them compromise without the fighting or distractions that can happen when spouses are face-to-face.

Mediators do not advise clients; instead, these experienced professionals who have backgrounds in marriage counseling, psychology, and similar fields keep communication on track so that negotiations can move forward.

On the other hand, a divorce lawyer’s job is to be the one to offer advice to their client with regard to the negotiations being presented.

Lawyers with divorce law firms communicate only with their clients, while mediators communicate with both spouses. 

In Summary

Ultimately, the decision of whether to work with a divorce law firm even when knowing from the start that mediation is the goal is a personal one, but it is highly recommended.

Spouses should still have the representation of an experienced divorce attorney for their benefit to protect their own interests while attempting to compromise and be more amicable.